Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Being a Mother

I will be honest and say that prior to having Luke, when I would think about having children, I very rarely thought about any of the not-so-fun-things of parenting. I knew those times would be there, but I chose not to think of them.

Luke is now six. I’ve had a lot of the not-so-fun-times. However, up until last weekend, I had not actually been the cause of those times. At least I do not think I have.

Last Saturday we arrived at Luke’s t-ball game and I got out of the truck, and slammed the door shut. I had not realized Luke’s hand was in the door. Not until Josh screamed at me to open the door did I realize this.

Once I realized what I had done, my first thought was of course about Luke. Had I broken his fingers? After his many, many tears stopped, Josh was able to determine that his fingers were not broke. He actually played in his t-ball game. His fingers never swelled up, and no bruising occurred.

There is really no explanation to the fact that he has no lasting marks, other than a miracle --a miracle in which I have thanked God for that day and every day since.

That night, I crawled into bed with Luke after he went to sleep and I laid there and looked at him and cried. I cried thinking that my not paying attention could have seriously injured my child. I cried because I was so thankful that he was okay.

Monday when I picked Luke up from my Dad’s I gave him a hug, kiss, and then asked to see his hand. After inspecting it for the millionth time, I again, for the millionth time, told him how sorry I was for shutting his hand in the door.

Luke’s response, “It’s okay Mom. I have forgotten about it and I wish you would too.”

That sentence is so encompassing of the mother/child relationship. This boy could not care less what I had done to him. He has forgotten and loves me no less.

While there are many hard and no-so-fun-things about being a parent, those sure are few and far between compared to the good and loving times.

This week, leading up to Mother’s day, I am so thankful that God allowed me to be a Mother. The journey to having a child was not easy, and did not come without tears, but it came.

Thank you God for my Luke and for entrusting him to me….even knowing that I would one day shut his hand in a truck door.

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